For the first time in my life, I can use the word husband to define the nature and status of my relationship with Michael.
Michael is my husband. We were legally married in Salt Lake City, Utah on Friday, December 20, 2013. Michael proposed to me in July while we were in Japan and since then we have been making wedding plans. We planned (and still plan!) to have a big celebration in Salt Lake, but we did not think that we would actually be legally married in Salt Lake.
Earlier this year our friends Derek and Moudi along with two other couples filed a lawsuit in Utah challenging the legality of Amendment 3, Utah’s version of Prop 8. Thanks to them, the other plaintiffs, and their lawyers, the case went to court and on Friday U.S. District Judge Robert J. Shelby declared Amendment 3 unconstitutional. The day started as any normal Friday: Michael and I woke up, I answered emails, I did a little Christmas shopping, then took the train to my tea shop to work. At 1:43 p.m. our attorney friend called and said that Amendment 3 had been struck down by Judge Shelby and that if we were serious about getting married, to rush to the County Clerk’s office.
After we got the call from our friend, Michael and I looked at each other, stopped everything we were doing and jumped in the car.
In a nutshell this is what happened when we got to the County Clerk’s office. Continue reading →
This is the first time I remember seeing a video like this, of someone coming out to a mother who doesn’t know she is being filmed. I came out years ago and it wasn’t filmed but that experience is still fresh in my mind. My parents reacted a similar way this mother does in the video. I can’t imagine a parent reacting any other way than with love, support, and happiness. Anything less is unacceptable.
I thought this was a heartwarming video, but others did not. There are some ugly and hateful comments left by complete strangers, bullies who stand in the way of love and progress and peace. But love always prevails despite the tortures it must sometimes endure. Love conquers all, always has and always will. Continue reading →
This story about how we should approach marriage equality in terms of commitment rather than equal rights ran in The Advocate a few weeks ago. I found it on a website called The Third Way, a think tank that advances moderate political ideas like strong private sector growth, clean energy, and making progress on divisive social issues.
I had never thought about framing my arguments supporting marriage equality in terms of commitment. When my straight friends get married they don’t say it’s for the purpose of filing taxes jointly or having hospital visitation rights or pensions, they say it’s about love and commitment. Because it is. Continue reading →
For months I had been looking forward to my cross country road trip with my little sister that I dubbed “The Southern Belle Tour” starring me as the southern belle. I imagined driving through the south, drinking mint juleps in adorable towns, perhaps meeting a handsome southern man with whom I’d have a fairytale romance, and say things like, “I declare!”
It was not to be. Like most of my dreams that don’t come true, the Southern Belle Tour was nothing like I imagined, it was a complete disaster from day one. Continue reading →
In 1981 my mother was a newlywed and expecting her first child (me) so as a ward Homemaking activity, my mom along with some other women from the ward “done a quilt” (as my Utah grandmother would say).
Young newlyweds are often poor and my parents were no exception. When my mom went to the fabric store she bought the cheapest fabric she could for the quilt: a few yards of bright yellow, orange, red, blue and green. She liked the bright colors and sewed strips of fabric into a rainbow quilt. Continue reading →